Cake And Too
by spacemonkey69
Summary: Chandler has to know what's in the closet. From 'TOW The Secret Closet' please read and review.


Okay, I was watching TOW the Secret Closet last night, which I just love, and I knew I had to write a fic about it. I know, I know, I'm that sad, but be quiet. So, anyway, this is just a stupid little thing, kinda cute. Oh, and, even though I watched it yesterday, and have seen it 47,000 other times, I cannot remember if a day passed from when Joey and Chandler talked about the closet, to when Chandler opened it. I don't think it did, but let's just assume that...well, actually it doesn't really even matter, thinking about it now. Just go with the flow, aight! I'll just shut up now, and ask you to please read and review. Oh, and the title is reference to the episode..you know, Richard being the cake, Chandler being the too.

I might do a couple more little one shot, cute, funny things because...well, people have been asking for them, and I try to deliver. But then I'll prolly go into writing another chapter fic, that's what I think I'll do anyway, let's see, shall we? But please, read, review, love you, etc.

I do not own friends/actors/characters, but I do own the need to see 'The Ron Clark Story'. Matty fans who watched it, details, please, for the poor little Aussie girl! 

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Chandler struggled with Monica's tools, trying not to think about the fact that his wife had tools and he didn't. It wasn't weird, not at all.

"Damn closet," he muttered, glaring at it before resuming his attempts of getting the door off. He had to. He had to know.

Why would she keep it locked, why?

Not because of Richard and bugs, as Joey had so wonderfully suggested. There had to be another reason.

Maybe she was testing him? Maybe she wanted him to lose his credit card?

He glared spitefully at the door again, knowing he _had _to open it. Not just because of the need to, but because…

Well, he needed his credit card.

But there had to be a reason.

Maybe she kept porn in there?

Girl on girl porn?

Chandler stopped, a stupid grin covering his face. He quickly shook his head.

No, that was stupid.

It'd be hot though.

Maybe it was guy on guy porn?

"Ew," he muttered to himself, then let out a cry as the door suddenly came loose. "Yeah, baby!" He pulled it away, set it against the wall, then turned to see what was inside.

"Richard?" Chandler gasped in shock. "What the hell are you doing?"

"I think I should ask you the same question!"

"…What!"

"You know you're not allowed in this closet!"

"Oh, and you are?" Chandler asked shrilly. Richard frowned.

"Look, Chandler, I think it would be best if you just close the closet door and forget all about this."

"Wha- I- How the hell could I forget about this?" Chandler spluttered, face turning red. They both jumped when they heard keys rattling in the hallway. Chandler looked at Richard in horror

"I was never here," Richard said inconspicuously, before grabbing the door and slamming it shut-

"Gah!" Chandler bolted up in bed, looking around the dark room in horror. Monica stirred in her sleep and Chandler realised he had just been dreaming.

Damn Joey, putting ideas in his head. But still…

He quietly slipped out of bed, shooting a glare towards Monica. Dream or not, he was still annoyed. He had to know what was in that closet, he thought as he walked out of the bedroom,

How did Richard even fit in there?

That thought stopped him in his tracks, but then he chastised himself. Dream, just a dream, he reminded himself as he walked towards the closet.

The door was standing slightly ajar.

Chandler paused warily, flicked on the light, then stared at it for a bit longer. Monica wouldn't have left it open…right?

"Richard?" he tried a moment later, voice almost trembling. He let out an annoyed grunt at his patheticness, then grabbed the door and yanked it open.

"Oh my God!" was all he could get out before the bugs jumped at him. He let out a girlish scream and bolted, bugs crawling all over him as he left the apartment. Millions and millions of bugs.

Joey's door opened, and he peered out to find Chandler emerging from his own apartment.

"What? What's wron- Holy crap! I told you! I told you not to open the closet!"

"Get them off of me!" Chandler screamed, feeling one crawling up his leg, crawling towards his-

"Gah!" Chandler bolted up in bed, looking around the dark room in horror. Monica stirred in her sleep and Chandler realised he had just been dreaming.

He glanced over at the bedroom door, wondering if he should…

"To hell with that!"

"Chandler?" Monica asked groggily, opening her eyes to find her husband sitting up. "Honey, what's wrong?"

"Oh, you know…"

"You're not still thinking about that closet, are you?" she asked after a beat. Chandler looked at her, wide eyed.

"No, I've decided to respect my wife's privacy." He could always get another credit card.

"I thought you might," Monica said smiling. Chandler smiled back, lying down. "Night, honey."

"Night, Mon," he said, distracted, trying to figure out which was worse. Richard, or millions of bugs?

The answer was pretty simple, and Chandler knew he would need a bigger baseball bat if he ever tried to open the closet.

Richard.


End file.
